Teaching Tools

A mother wants to raise her children the best way she can, and knows how.  I am not going to go into my own family dynamics while growing up, but I will say that the way I was raised...well, my obedience was demanded of me.  In some ways, it was easier for my parents.  They never had to actually think ahead of us kiddos.  We were therefore taught that any other type of obedience was not obedience at all, but disobedience.

As a student teacher, one of the tools I learned is that if the students, themselves, were not focused on where they needed to be, concerning the lesson that was trying to be taught, the ideal thing to do was to use that as a learning opportunity and a teaching moment.  Then, a few minutes later, redirecting them to the actual lesson.

The same is with raising a family.  Now, granted, the last few days have been a little frustrating, but after giving it some serious thought, I realized that more than likely, I had gone my "own" direction, neglecting to consult my husband first.  Not only that, but despite the fact that I do not want to raise my children the same way I was raised, the true issue was not that I was frustrated with my children concerning their behavior, the true issue laid in the fact that I was frustrated I was fighting the way I was raised with how I WANT to raise my family.  Both can not win.  There will always be a winner.  There will always be a loser.  No wonder why my kiddos are acting up!!!  They are receiving mixed messages from myself and my husband!  If my husband I are on the same wave length, the children's' behavior will settle down because they have noticed that Mommy and Daddy can not be pinned against each other.  If we are not, then we receive the opposite reaction of what we truly want.

Yes, children should be obedient, but we all have different ways of learning.  I learn in a visual/kinesthetic way, but someone else may learn by books, etc.  The same is with obedience.  If we are flexible, and give where we can (in other words, saying "Yes." more than "No."), the kiddos wont feel as if they have been controlled all day when something majorly important comes up, and the answer has to be "No.".  In short, there will be no fight.  I personally, am not perfect at this.  It is a constant daily lesson I learn and struggle with.  However, that does not mean I do not demand obedience.  It just means that we get to our destination a little differently than expected.